For quite some time I had a bit of an internal battle with myself and my abilities in the yoga class. My body felt heavy and unyielding. I attributed this blame on one of the newer instructors. I found her classes where too much a platform for her to express her opinions and viewpoints. I found that instead of providing encouragement, we were regarded as ballooned, ignorant ego’s, that needed to be humbled in order to find enlightenment. I had too many teachers like that in high school. I respond much better to positive reinforcement – rather than manipulative persuasion from holier than thou experts. In yoga, I especially felt this offensive. In my still young learnings, what I have started to value the most – is self love – being easy on yourself – being filled with love and gratitude for who you are and what you can achieve. It is a gentle lesson, one of love and respect and then, you know what…spread it around thereafter. It is easy to bash, criticize, make someone feel inept. To taunt or bully, evoking a reaction. How awesome it is to rather inspire, encourage, feed that little defiance of gravity that raises someone’s chin!
Well there are those instructors that do just that: inspire and teach. They say; “Try it, you never know” “and “For this last second stretch your leg up higher than you ever have before” and then “Breath.” Last night I attended such a class, for the first time in a long time, I understood a bit more about the layers, the complexity, the eternal and ever changing learning process of yoga. There are so many discoveries that one can make, once a focus can be maintained and a stillness in mind achieved – even be it for a few seconds – it becomes such an awesome gift. After such a class one can only drop your head to the ground in gratitude, in awe, in love.
I have also made a solemn vow – to not direct any more of my frustration on a new teacher – I am sure she too will find her way.